FACT: Melissa Silverman, daughter of NBC television
executive Fred Silverman, loved the Smurfs so much she
inspired her father to create the Smurfs animated series
which ran for almost a decade.
OPINION: I love fruit salad, why has nobody made
an animated series out of that?
FACT: Smurf figurines stamped with a special "M"
stick-figure on the bottom are produced by a company called
"Schleich". Schleich stopped marking their figurines with
the special "M" around 1972.
OPINION: "M" stands for "Motherfuck! These things
scream when you burn the letter 'M' into their feet!"
FACT: The word "Smurf" is used extensively by
the Smurfs, as a noun, verb, and everything in-between.
OPINION: Using the word "Smurf" in different contexts
can lead to confusion. For example, saying "Smurf my ass"
will either get you arrested, or a discount on a lawnchair
FACT: Smurf figurines debuted in 1965, although
they were not available in North America until 1980.
OPINION: North American imigration policies prevented
the arrival of millions of little blue people and Smurfs
too. Stop racism.
FACT: Smurf figurines are made of PVC, stand 2"
tall, and have eight fingers and eight toes.
OPINION: These figurines are obviously anatomically
incorrect. Smurfs are three apples tall, not 2". And,
unlike the figurines, they do have cocks.
FACT: There are six Easter Smurf figurines.
OPINION: My favorite is Jesus Smurf with his mushroom
FACT: In Chinese, "Smurf" translates to "Lan Jing
Ling". OPINION: Try ordering that in a Chinese
food restaurant. They taste squishy.
FACT: The Smurfs were created in in Brussels,
Belgium by Pierrot Culliford (Peyo) in 1958.
OPINION: He was under the heavy influence of drugs
and leprachaun magic.
FACT: The Smurfs debuted in newspaper comic entitled
"Johan et Pirouit".
OPINION: "Johan et Pirouit" was the first comic
to feature little blue creatures, and full frontal nudity.
FACT: Each Smurf Christmas tree ornament figurine
comes with a fine gold cord.
Strangle your little Christian Smurfs with this gold
cord in order to sacrifice them to our Lord and Saviour,
never fell in love at no stinking rock show..