Gordon Lightfoot is Destiny's Child
(Or Destiny's Child is Gordon Lightfoot)

"

Kelly, can you handle this?
Michelle, can you handle this?
Beyoncé, can you handle this?
I don't think they can handle this!

There was a time in this fair land when the railroad did not run
When the wild majestic mountains
Stood alone against the sun
Long before the white man and long before the wheel
When the green dark forest was too silent to be real

Kelly, can you handle this?
Michelle, can you handle this?
Beyoncé, can you handle this?
I don't think they can handle this!

But time has no beginnings and history has no bounds
As to this verdant country they came from all around
They sailed upon her waterways and they walked the forests tall
And they built the mines, the mills and the factories for the good of us all

You gotta do much better if you gone dance with me tonight
You gotta work your jelly if you gone dance with me tonight
Read my lips carefully if you like what you see
Move, groove, prove you can hang with me
By the looks I got you shook up and scared of me
Hook up your seatbelt, it's time for takeoff

And when the young man's fancy was turning to the spring
The railroad men grew restless for to hear the hammers ring
Their minds were overflowing with the visions of their day
And many a fortune lost and won and many a debt to pay

Barely move, we've arrived
Lookin sexy, lookin fly
Baddest chick, chick inside
DJ, jam tonight
Spotted me a tender thang
There you are, come on baby
Don't you wanna dance with me
Can you handle, handle me

For they looked in the future and what did they see
They saw an iron road running from the sea to the sea
Bringing the goods to a young growing land
All up through the seaports and into their hands

I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this
Cause my body too bootylicious for ya babe

Look away said they across this mighty land
From the eastern shore to the western strand

Baby, can you handle this?
Baby, can you handle this?
Baby, can you handle this?
I don't think you can handle this!

Bring in the workers and bring up the rails
We gotta lay down the tracks and tear up the trails
Open her heart let the life blood flow
Gotta get on our way 'cause we're moving too slow

I'm about to break you off
H-town goin hard
Lead my hips, slap my thighs
Swing my hair, square my eyes
Lookin hot, smellin good
Groovin like I'm from the hood
Look over my shoulder, I blow you a kiss
Can you handle, handle this

Bring in the workers and bring up the rails
We're gonna lay down the tracks and tear up the trails
Open her heart let the life blood flow
Gotta get on our way 'cause we're moving too slow
Get on our way 'cause we're moving too slow

I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this
Cause my body too bootylicious for ya babe

Behind the blue Rockies the sun is declining
The stars they come stealing at the close of the day
Across the wide prairie our loved ones lie sleeping
Beyond the dark ocean in a place far away

I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this
Cause my body too bootylicious for ya babe

We are the navvies who work upon the railway
Swinging our hammers in the bright blazing sun
Living on stew and drinking bad whiskey
Bending our old backs til the long days are done

I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this
Cause my body too bootylicious for ya babe

We are the navvies who work upon the railway
Swinging our hammers in the bright blazing sun
Laying down track and building the bridges
Bending our old backs til the railroad is done

Move your body up and down (whoo!)
Make your booty touch the ground (whoo!)
I can't help but wonder why (whoo!)
Is my vibe too vibealacious for you, babe

So over the mountains and over the plains
Into the muskeg and into the rain
Up the St. Lawrence all the way to Gaspe
Swinging our hammers and drawing our pay
Driving them in and tying them down
Away to the bunkhouse and into the town
A dollar a day and a place for my head
A drink to the living, a toast to the dead

I shake my jelly at every chance
When I whip with my hips you slip into a trance
I'm hoping you can handle all this jelly that I have
Now let's cut a rug while we scat some jazz

Oh the song of the future has been sung
All the battles have been won
On the mountain tops we stand
All the world at our command
We have opened up the soil
With our teardrops and our toil

[Scatting]

For there was a time in this fair land when the railroad did not run
When the wild majestic mountains stood alone against the sun
Long before the white man and long before the wheel
When the green dark forest was too silent to be real
When the green dark forest was too silent to be real
And many are the dead men too silent to be real

I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this jelly
I don't think you ready for this
Cause my body too bootylicious for ya babe

"

Fatlip Saturday goes all fucking weekend.